CLM Hen House

staci · Joined: 03 Apr 2026 Posts: 4

i'm just not sure how to get ladies motivated... any time a subject is brought up they won't say a word they just look around at the other ladies and then if they do comment it's negative or "no we don't really want to do that"...... help

amyjoyousone · Joined: 29 May 2025 Posts: 52

This is not unusual in Women's Ministries (or in any ministry, I think). Try a written survery listing several ideas and asking for other ideas. If this could be inserted into the bulletin, so the ladies are able to fill it out in private, that would be good. Usually in a group, you have a few more energetic outgoing ladies, talk to them privately (take them to lunch or give them a phone call) and enlist their support. "Sister X, you are always so much fun to be with. Our Women's Ministries needs a jolt! What do you think about....?" and get them talking. Ask ladies what they've done in the past that they enjoyed. Just be enthusiastic yourself, that will translate to the group. You may have to just plan an event, recruit a few helpers and get the ball rolling that way. God bless as you venture out!
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Rejoice in the Lord always, and again I say, rejoice! Philippians 4:4

jodi · Joined: 14 Mar 2026 Posts: 217 Location: Lake Mary, FL

I have to second the survey idea. I did this with my ladies and got some good ideas. They probably would not have spoke up if I asked them in a group setting for ideas. But in a survey format they had time to think about what they would like to do.
Once I got their ideas I did my best to implement them and give credit to the lady who suggested it. That way they knew I really valued their input.
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~Jodi

staci · Joined: 03 Apr 2026 Posts: 4

thank you ladies for your input and i love the suggestion of a survey, most of the ladies are older and not really able to do some things but i am working on some of the younger ladies and i am all for the wisdom of age but also love the get up and go of youth. thanks again

BarbaraH · Joined: 16 Mar 2026 Posts: 22 Location: SC

I agree with a survey. It gives them time to think, plus they might feel freer to express themselves anonymously.

Another idea is to make suggestions that involve choices: "Do you all want to go bowling or putt-putting next month?" You could even incorporate that type of thing in a survey -- a list of suggested activities, and they check off what they like, plus space to add any suggestions they might have.

KellyR · Joined: 15 May 2025 Posts: 10

I'm not sure what setting it is that the ladies aren't motivated in but if you are have group meetings where you are planning or soliciting input here are a few suggestions. Remember they will always tend to feed off from you so if you are excited they hopefully will be too.

When I have planned a years worth of ladies activities we have taken 3 meetings to organize....sometimes 4.
The very first meeting we always have a chalk board or dry erase and get a volunteer to write (not leader). Then we go around in a circle and everyone suggests an idea. If you can't think of one or someone already said it then "pass". All ideas are placed on a board and if someone needs to ask for clarifiacation they can ask but no debating Pro's and Cons otherwise with women you will never get anything done with all the side conversations plus it's also hard on the one who volunteered the idea. Keep going around the table until the entire table has passed and stay in order. If you pass and it comes back around to you and you've got another idea then you say it. When all ideas are listed then you vote. Everyone can get to vote for say 3-4 favorites or so while you go through the list. Take a raised hand vote for each, recording the number. When you are through erase all of those that no one voted for or had only 1-2 votes. Do a vote all over again erasing all numbers and maybe reducing their items they can vote for to 2-3. This goes very quickly and you can reduce you ideas down to the ammount you need for the year. By using the circle style of facilitation everyone gets a turn even the nonvocal ones and no one has their idea shot down right after they suggest it. It also puts some controls on those who always have something to say!

Having a specific agenda layed out for your meetings helps to. Both for leadership planning and the meetings you are getting together to plan. Even having this typed out is even better with room for note taking. What do you want to include and what are the time frames. At a moms group I helped run we had 2 hours for each meeting and we started with a devotional and prayer, announcements, speaker, group discussion where we broke up to smaller groups and discussed the topic for the day and a craft. Our leadership meetings had an agenda too. We started with a devotional and prayer, old business, new business, each leader area also had time to discuss their own area and how things were going or help they needed so finance, caft leader, hospitality, etc. would all give input or reports. My job was to keep everyone on track and help the meeting flow without too many tangent conversations. An occasional light heart joke was needed if someone was getting off subject or redirection back to topic.

My final idea is something we started when we needed more physical help from the moms attending because leadership had their hands full. We called it "helping hands" and those who joined were asked to volunteer xxx ammount of hours volunteering, for us it was 4-6 each because we had 30-40 women. So if we had a fundraiser they could contribute hours or in any other ways the group needs help. We also had snacks/food on this. When they gave in hours we had them mark it on an index card that we kept out in a box. When they brought in food that was required they marked it. Everyone had a card inside with name address and phone at the top and requirements down the side. If someone needed volunteers they could take home the box and call those who hadn't contributed yet. Of course the box and tops of the cards had cute colorful hands on them The nice thing is that you volunteer for those things that you are able to do.

We do a survey at the end of the year for all attending and put all ideas suggested on the chalk board for the vote and we also evaluate our service through them. One thing about surveys is they need to be simple with no long winded answers required only rating items or checking things off. If they are timeconsuming or even seem too long they won't do them. Motivate them to turn in with a small prize or gift on returning or name in for a drawing.

Whew!
Hope that helps.
First time I post and I'm long winded!

Kelly

staci · Joined: 03 Apr 2026 Posts: 4

thanks kelly, i got a some good ideas to try. i am not the ladies president but soon i will be and i am so fired up i can't stand it but patience is something i am learning. i can see things that need to be done now but as i have stated in my post i can see that i have my work cut out for me, they are mostly older ladies and really they just want to have a few dinners after church and that's it. i want to see meetings, gatherings, crafts, ladies going out and bringing others into the fold. my husband is a minister and i guess some of his preaching has rubbed off on me....
thanks again,
staci

Cindy · Joined: 18 Mar 2026 Posts: 1 Location: PA

Hi Staci,

I completely understand your frustration. We have been serving at this church for 5 years now. I am at my witts end. A tureen dinner after worship is fine...but they just wont move for the Lord! The younger girls are busy with taking their children to "sports practices and then the games" and the older ladies.. well we never>>>>>>>>>>>>> . I'd love to have a women's bible study and mentor group and just get going for the Lord.

I think all that we can do is pray and offer them the banquet table and it is up to them to eat from it. This fall I am extending my ministry to women to the local community.

I encourage you to keep close to the Lord and find ways to be fed spiritually. I too am a pastors wife.

In Christ
Cindy

SherriG · Joined: 16 Mar 2026 Posts: 5

Dear Staci, I know your feelings exactly. My husband has been pastoring our Church for 4 years and it has been a struggle, but definately worth the effort to bring about changes. As president of Ladies Circle I can offer what has worked for me - introduce, then expand. Example- introduce scripture reading (ask for volunteers) at each Ladies event, then expand to discussion on scripture (this may take several months). This lead us to a Ladies Bible Study. Our study started out very small in numbers, but when other ladies of the Church saw us growing in wisdom, love and unity, then others joined! Prayer was my biggest challenge. This group used to stand and hold hands and recite the Lord's Prayer at each closing of a meeting. I introduced spoken prayer requests first (in our hand holding circle) then I would pray out loud myself (instead of Lord's Prayer), then I asked if anyone else wanted to pray- this too took several months. Now we close in our cirlce and each lady prays her prayer out loud! (if someone isn't comfortable doing so, they just squeeze the hand they are holding and we move on.) We have grown so close together by doing this. We started having quarterly women's fellowhip services that invite and include all ladies of the Church (not just Ladies Circle "members"). At these services we meet in the sanctuary and pray, sing songs, read scripture, poems, testify, cry and share in a way that women can truly feel free to open up together. Then we go downstairs for food and fellowship. At first I planned the themes, now we have volunteers for each season that plans the service- theme idea, getting speakers and singers etc. From this we have had women step up and start several ministries within the Church that are thriving! Our summer event is this week and the focus is having liberty in Christ. I think women sometimes have a hard time with that. We do now feel very free to serve the Lord within the boundries HE has set for us. I will be praying for your new and exciting journey. It is worth it all!
SherriG

staci · Joined: 03 Apr 2026 Posts: 4

thank you all for your answers. i have gained some insight into this really tough issue. i can see so many things that need to be done.... but you sometimes feel that your hands are tied.
thanks again,
staci