www.creativeladiesministry.com

[Guest]

Greetings.
I don't know how to begin this other than to dive right in.
I have gleaned much from this ministry. It is wonderful. Iread and read and decided today I must write.
My hands are shaking as I type this so bear with any mistakes I make.
My husband is a minister. He has been for a good number of years. We are at a church now that is great and supprtive and hav been here 2 years.
The problem is this, I have found out that my husband is smoking. This disturbs me so because it is so stupid for one thing and Idon't know why he would ever do this. I confronted him and he denied it. That makes matters alot worse. I wanted to believe him. Weeks later I still smelled it on him and began "snooping" I hate myself for that. But I found lighter and smelly stuff to cover smells and even a toothbrush and tootpaste in his office drawer at the church. That really bothered me. I figured since he lied to me about that, what else? So I snooped some more. And hated myslef even more for that. I decidewd to get into his email. Then I wished I never had. I found all kinds of emails from nasty smutty websites. I know sometimes you just get sent that stuff, but EVERY ONE of the emails was like this. BAD! I deleted them all. I don't want him to have access to them. I cannot confront him again. He will just lie to me again. I told him I knew he was lyinga botu the smoking and I have not spoken to him in 2 days. He has been sleeping on the couch and I just don't stay home when he is here. I cannot stand dishontsty. I pray and pray for our ministry and our church and I know God is not going to bless it when there is sin like this. So I feel like I am getting punished for his sin! Maybe I am making too much out of this. I don't know. I willl just try to calm down. And pray more. That has been really hard to do. I don't even know what or how to pray.
Bye.

[creativ4]

Dear Friend,

I am so glad that you have found this website helpful and felt comfortable in sharing such a terrible burden that has been placed upon your shoulders. I don't have a wise and sagely answer to give to you, but please know that I will make this a matter of prayer. I have seen so many situations like this over time and especially with the advent of the internet, so many that would never have gotten caught up into things find it so easy to stray. I will pray that the Lord will work in the heart of your husband, and that the Lord will guide you, comfort you, and give you wisdom as only He can do for you.

If you feel you want to email me personally, please feel free to do so,
julia@creativeladiesministry.com
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Joy and blessings,
Julia

[Kristin]

I will definately be praying for you. And as hard as it seems...you need to follow scriptue with this. First of all love him and I know you have a lot of wild feelings right now. Secondly, since you have tried to confront him, Matthew 18:15-17 states that you are to bring 1 or two with you. Is there any elder/decon/trusted mentor of your husbands that you could talk to? Does anyone hold your husband accountable? Third, you have to remember that "our" churches are in the Lord's hands...and we would never want to do something/have someone defile it. If your husband repents and humbles himself before the Lord...then your church will benefit, but if his sin continues to fester...the Lord will be against him and the church.

Please feel free to email me at riomommy@frontiernet.net if you need to just "talk" I will be praying for you and your situation.

Serving our Master and Lord,
Kristin
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As most moms, I have several hats! I am wife, pastor's wife, mom, friend, women's ministry leader, Pampered Chef Consultant and most important...child of God!

[Bethany]

Praying for you even now, for God's wisdom and guidance, that you will follow His leading and see His hand at work in this situation.
With love,
Bethany
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God bless,
Bethany
WELCOME HOSTESS

[guest]

I can somewhat identify with your situation. My husband has a problem with pornogrophy. For 25 years I have been dealing with this. Yes he is a christian. There is no one for me to go to because he has such a good reputation outside the home. I would't tell anyone because I don't want anyone to think bad of him. It does make things difficult at times. I don't have any answers for you other than just pray and ask God to convict him of his problem.

[amyb]

I will be praying for you-for God's wisdom, for a Godly person to go with you, and for him especially to respond not with anger and denial, but with repentance and humbleness.
Hang in there-May God give you comfort and peace that is unexplainable, except in him.
Maybe Psalm 103 could be encouraging to you.-God Bless
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In His grip and grace.